Learning to Flow

by Maranatha Chapman

 

 

 

How do you know if you are too rigid, way too uptight, controlling, and a big stick-in-the-mud? Structure, organization, and being on top of everything is good and even important, but there is a point that we can move to where we get obsessed and become oppressive. I have recently been asked various questions be mamas who greatly desire to have the Lord's life in their homes and follow the Holy Spirit's leadings throughout their day, but they keep running into difficulties in how to flow with Him and what to let go of and when.

In order to learn to flow better with the Lord, let's start with some basic questions to see where you find yourself in the "too uptight" scale.

How do you do with messes and spills? Truthfully, this can be a daily peace stealer. If you can get easily frustrated by this, you must take this to Jesus. It is a control issue! You have to relax some, let go, and not allow silly things to ruffle your feathers-things that are so trivial and insignificant in the scope of eternity. Allow the Holy Spirit to show you why you get irritated by this. Many times the root is selfishness. Always remember these two things: you are there to serve your children and messes do clean up so they are really no big deal. What would you rather live out before God and man (and your husband and children) and have as your testimony-that you are one who continues abiding in Jesus despite the messes and spills in life or one who is easily thrown into aggravation and fretting by the same?

How do you do with changed plans? This is a great one to check and see if we are hanging on to plans and people or hanging on to Jesus and His Lordship and leadership of our lives. If you find security in things "being set in stone," things being the same, or always knowing what is going to happen next, then turn away from this! Grasping this is death and will never bring the true security that "following the Lamb wherever He goes" will (Rev. 14:4). He alone is Life. When we feel the need for stability we need to look to Jesus.

Are you good at waiting? This could be just being still before the Lord, listening for Him. It could be waiting on your husband for an answer to something or for him to get home. If you demand immediate responses and results, or you just have to know (fill in the blank) right now or you feel like you can't go on, then allow the Lord to teach you patience. We need to be okay with not knowing certain things and with things taking a while, otherwise, in our limited knowledge, we cannot learn to flow in faith with the leadings and the timing of Him who knows all things.

Are you "out of rest" (re: Heb. 3-4) until tasks are completed and all loose ends are tied down? This could be as simple as being unpleasant and hyper about the laundry being all caught up, and feeling like you cannot relax until it is all finally put away. If this describes you, then your "goal orientedness" is not you being filled with the Holy Spirit, it is just you walking according to your flesh. Whether you are of the "army sergeant" variety or the compulsive and meticulous sort, be courageous and call it what it is-flesh-because it will hinder your ability to listen for the Master, follow His commands, and be as "the wind" in flowing with Him.

Are you predominantly negative, naggy, or aggressively insistent on things being done your way? Does your demeanor and tone of voice make others feel like they are in the way? If you aren't sure, ask those closest to you. When asking, make sure to give them a big preface that you really desire to know the truth about this and for them not to hold back but to be completely honest with you. We need people in our lives who can show us our blind spots. Also, how we communicate is a huge indicator of where our heart is and thus our availability to the Lord (Matt. 12:33-37, Luke 6:42-45).


So we can see things we need to let go of, but what are we to let go to ? Flowing with our Lord requires us to daily lay down our agendas and preferences and truly seek the Lord for His way and His plan, and then go with it (i.e., wholeheartedly let go to it) when He reveals it to us. It also requires us to humble ourselves and learn His new way when we see ourselves bent out of shape. It is a way that is so much more peaceful than the frustrated turmoil of us trying to control life and accomplish by our own strength what seems most important to us but usually isn't to Him.

Now there is bound to be some of you who are reading this who honestly do not see yourself as having a hard time with flowing. In fact, you are probably cheering on this little sermon and hoping that your uptight sisters will read it, get convicted, and loosen up. But before you pride yourself in your flowing, uncontrolling way, make certain that you do not have a different kind of hindrance-that of packaging laziness or being inconsiderate of others as "flowing with the Lord." There is a different type of flesh pattern that says, in essence, "Don't press me! I'll get things done at my own pace" or "I'll show up when I feel like it, even if I am late." You can pretend to be flowing "as the wind" with the Lord but in reality you are someone who cannot be counted on, who doesn't follow through or finish anything, and who definitely doesn't like those "rigid" and "uptight" people calling you into account. You actually have an even bigger control problem than the ones described in the bullet points above but you mask it with "flowing with the Spirit" so that you are not accountable.

When I speak of flowing with the Spirit, I am really, actually talking about finding what the Shepherd has and following His steps. Incline your ear, listen for Him, and don't get wrapped up in either the fussiness of everyday life or the avoidance of your responsibilities (2 Tim. 2:1-7). Jesus has a will for us today and it is good for us to let go of all our control and move with Him in His reigning over and directing our lives. You will actually enjoy your life so much more and have so much more peace.

 

"For whoever wishes to save his life shall lose it; but whoever loses his life for My sake shall find it."

(Matthew 16:25)

  

 

 

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